How I started volunteering.

Theresa in 1980

Volunteering is talked about as a good thing in America. There are different nuanced perspectives in different countries and cultures, even differences in multi-cultural America. Still, around the world volunteering – doing until others, is considered a virtue.

A virtue many people don’t practice much. Some might casually help out now and then.  Many never look for the time. Others, in our upside down world, believe that volunteering is a waste of time – nothing personally gained and enabling lazy undeserving people or some other nonsense.

I feel sorry for those people, not the lazy undeserving people. I’ve seen a few – but they are not always, not usually, poor. No, I feel sorry for the people who think volunteering is a waste of time, nothing personally gained. Those I’ve known don’t seem to be very happy.

After years of volunteering I can assure you it is AMAZING for you as well as helpful to others and the planet. I’m happy doing it.

I didn’t always think this way. My parents implanted the value of helping others. I’ve always tried, particularly those in immediate need and the underdogs. However, as a baby boomer and a guy – most of my life was focused on working and providing for my family. Like many men my age I certainly spent too much time at work focused on money to get stuff for the family. Regrets, we all have them, but this post is focused on volunteering.

How I got into volunteering

The tsunami hit Indonesia in 2004. I was watching TV and my wife Theresa was on the computer to donate money to the International Red Cross. At the time, most of my “volunteering” was donating money and some small time at church. She asked, “How much?” I replied, “The usual amount. And at some point we might want to think about volunteering for the Red Cross.”

I don’t know why I said it. And as a guy sitting in a recliner after a long day at work “might want to think about” – I probably just wanted to feel good about myself without getting out of my comfortable chair, my comfortable life. And “At some point” certainly didn’t mean in the next five minutes.

However, my wife heard something else and in less that 5 minutes had told me that she had applied to local Red Cross Disaster Services and it was my turn. I rolled my eyes, but did it. And so began 9 years of volunteering for the Red Cross. I was a team lead – I would get the page at all hours and organize a team to respond to fire, flood, whatever. Theresa typically handled client interviews and paperwork to provide support and comfort to those impacted, although in big events we all did that.

There were many MANY times I hated the pager I carried in the five team rotation. I’d look at the time and realize I’d probably get back home in time for a quick shower to get rid of the smoke smell before I went off to work. Having to wake others up, never easy. Waking up a husband at 2 in the morning to ask for his wife for a Red Cross call, don’t even get me started.

However, there was NEVER a time that I did not feel good about helping others – even if it was just supporting the first responders. The work at times was stressful and confusing – but it was always worth it – that sense of helping others at a critical time, making things better.

After some time Theresa added volunteering for a parish based Catholic charity – The Society of St. Vicent de Paul. This organization goes into people’s homes – gets to know them – and provides assistance in a thoughtful reasoned manner. She dragged me into that as well as her second and driver when I was around – leaving the paperwork to her. (I’m not saying that I’m a perfect volunteer.)

We talked about volunteering in the Peace Corps as a couple. A dream of going off somewhere after I retired and before we settled down and did the grandparent thing. It would have been a good life, it was a good dream.

Hawaii vacation 2010 

The reality is that my wife got sick with an unfair illness and the best that I could do was to support her, caring for her in our house to the end, and doing medical and insurance paperwork. Five years ago on the 20th of December the dream of volunteering together died when my wife move on.

I carried on. I spend a few months looking for that grandparent plot of land with no luck. After six months I didn’t see the point of continuing to go to work in a corporate cubicle. (Nice company, but I wanted a change.) I was too young to retire – but too tired to keep working in a cubicle. I don’t have that much money, but we had saved some and had paid off the house. So, I decide to apply to the Peace Corps after seeing that the ACA would be my safety net until Medicare.

I served in Ghana from 2014-2016. Now on my second island in the Eastern Caribbean to serve 2017-2019. Peace Corps volunteering can be hard, frustrating, anxiety producing, mind numbing drudgery topped off with federal government paperwork and regulations. I highly recommend it for some people. I loved my time in the Upper West of Ghana teaching junior high students and exchanging ideas with people who have a different perspective. Dry and dusty most of the time, but the people and service was wonderful and life changing. I loved Dominica, love Dominica, and I am loving the people and the place of Grenada - so different in climate from Upper West Ghana.

Just like a fire call in the middle of a winter night – I get a supreme sense of satisfaction or something, I can’t really explain it properly - that feeling you get by helping others. Peace Corps is like local Red Cross Disaster Response on steroids 24x7. It is worth it and there are so many new people and experiences. First Sunday here I was able to trade African stories with a priest from Nigeria while drinking a beer. How do people get those experiences?

I’ll have more to say about Peace Corps volunteering in a future post. But I wanted to acknowledge Theresa’s impact on my life near this anniversary. She made me a better person by making me see the amazing benefits to others and to myself from volunteering. She got me hooked on it and I see no better way of spending my life.

More importantly, I wanted to encourage others to actively volunteer. Not just donating money or blood – both good. But putting yourself out there to help others and make the world a better place on a regular committed schedule.

Yes – it will at times be a pain, difficult, annoying, blah, blah, blah. Any serious volunteering can be heart-wrenching, frightening, stressful, horrifying at times - but still – do it. You and others will be better for it and so the world and planet will be better for it.

Find a good organization focused on a helping others, improving things – one that is well organized with a mission and experience that you really want to support – helping others directly or by making to world a better place. If you don’t have much time – maybe something like Habitat for Humanity on a regular schedule. Peace Corps is not for everyone. There are many good organizations dedicated to improving life, building up, supporting people and the planet. (I also recommend the grandparent life with local volunteering for people around my age. Neither is better, different people are in different circumstances – judgment free zone.)

After you get some volunteer experience and get the feeling I can’t explain – the one that drives you to keep at it despite everything telling you to stop – maybe you can explain it to me. All I know is that it is really AMAZING.

Love always,

John